Self-Care and the Spirit: Being Loving to Yourself Changes Everything

Whether or not you believe in a deity or set of deities, we have something that makes us who we are – some people call it the soul, others call it the spirit, but there is some spark of life in us that makes us who we are more than any part of our physical body does. Some people have speculated the spirit is separate, some that it lives in the heart or the brain, but it has been commonly accepted for some time that it exists. If you believe that it exists, then you must believe that it knows (on some level) how you treat yourself. You may even believe that it reacts to your thoughts about yourself and the way you feel about yourself. Being loving to yourself may help ease spiritual pain (when your spirit is suffering because you are in some way neglecting or bullying yourself). To some people this sounds hokey, but I have met more people who believe this to be true than people who do not.

Practicing self-care is one way to be loving to yourself. It is one way you can set aside time to just take care of yourself, process your thoughts, listen to your feelings, and attune yourself to your spirit. This can have a huge impact on every part of your being. It is kind of magical.

The goals that were broken down into the spiritual category for me all reflect a need for this kind of care. I know it is necessary to my spiritual, and therefore mental and physical, growth.

  1. Continue my spiritual work
  2. Pray more
  3. Make time weekly for my spirit

Continue My Spiritual Work –

Continuing my spiritual work means a lot of studying and a lot of learning. The work is never done. There are always more truths to discover if you go looking for them. I am chasing enlightenment, and I know there is no one way to find it. The quest must go on.

Pray More –

I am great at saying prayers each night before bed, but they are learned prayers. In my faith, praying is really having a (one-sided) conversation with the deity. Therefore, I need to start praying on a more personal level every day, even if it is very quick. I believe that prayer is one of the times that we are truly honest with ourselves about how we are doing, what we want and need, and how we truly feel on the inside. It can help us understand ourselves, finally let everything out that we have been holding inside, and make us feel calmer when it is over. It is not for everyone, but even if you do not believe your prayers will be answered, having a moment to just check in with yourself and be truly raw and exposed can have a healing effect.

Make Time for Spirit –

Once upon a time, I used to spend an hour or two every week in my bedroom with candles and incense and focus entirely on my spirit. Sometimes that meant self-care, sometimes that meant prayer, sometimes that meant just allowing myself to be present and relax. It had a profound effect on my mental health and my physical health, not just my spiritual health. When I got into a severe depressive episode, I stopped. I recently came out of the depression, so I am starting it up again in 2022.


Even if none of my goals seem like they are right for you, practicing being loving and kind to yourself can have an effect on you inside and out. It can change your thoughts, your perceptions, your emotions, and your reactions to outside factors. It can help you establish boundaries. It can help with physical and mental and spiritual pain. If you struggle with mental health at all, self-care can help you be more stable and productive. It can help you maintain balance in your life even when your mind is out of control. It is really hard, but I cannot stress enough how worth it is. Being loving to yourself (since actually loving yourself can be out of reach at times) can truly change your life. I wish you the very best in 2022.

— Justine

Created by Massachusetts mental health writer, Justine Steckling

Back to Top